Why Do Soulmates Withdraw: When Your Soulmate Pulls Back

Why do soulmates withdraw? What do you do when your soulmate pulls back from you and the relationship? It’s a very uncomfortable feeling when your soulmate withdraws, because you feel it in your soul. When you’re deeply connected to someone, especially a soulmate, withdrawal  is hard to deal with. Even for the bravest of souls. You feel your soulmate slipping away and you don’t know how to stop it from happening. And in most cases you have no idea why it’s happening!


For one reason or another a soulmate often withdraws from the other about two to four months into a relationship. Things always start out great. And the relationship gets serious very rapidly. There’s lots of communication because they call and text daily. You spend a lot of time together.

Things are happily zipping along and you grow closer and closer. And then everything changes. Out of nowhere your soulmate stops calling. They stop texting. Your daily communication is now reduced to three days a week, if that. And you only see each other on weekends. Then you spend less time together and less time communicating. After so much togetherness, you feel as if the bottom has fallen out of your world.

Your soulmate has literally pulled the rug from beneath your feet. Because a soulmate relationship is so strong from the connection perspective, you feel them energetically detach from you. Your connection is so strong but now you feel a wall between you. And you’re very aware something is missing.

Energetically and telepathically  you try to feel for them. But you can’t. You fear they aren’t there anymore. And you agonize that your soulmate is going to break up with you, or that they’re interested in someone else. You worry they’ve reconnected with their ex or met someone new. You blame yourself and torment yourself with a myriad of things you could have possibly done to offend, upset or anger them.

Why do soulmates withdraw when things were going so well? What causes them to retreat from you without saying anything about it?

Here are some of the reasons soulmates may need to pull back a little bit after dating for a few months.


After having a reality check your soulmate decides things need to slow down a bit. When your first met there was great chemistry. The connection was overwhelming and you spent a lot of time together getting to know each other. They let a lot of things in their life go so they could spend a lot of time with you. After all, they feel the connection also.

They stopped tending their yard, cleaning their place, watering the plants and spending time with friends. But when they withdraw they’re not showing you they don’t want to spend time with you. They’re just refocusing their attention back to things they neglected while you were in the honeymoon state. So they didn’t withdraw because they don’t want to spend time with you. They’re having to restore balance to their life out of necessity. This is normal, so relax.


They told you how great you are. All the time. You’re the best thing that ever happened to them,  and they know it. They’ve waited all their life for someone like you. You are “The One”.  They say they’re ready to start planning a future with you. You’re on Cloud 9 because this dream of a soulmate relationship is coming together.

Then they flip out and withdraw into the ether. Poof,  your soulmate just vanished into thin air. They no longer call or communicate. They may have blocked you from all social media. Even if you call them, they will not return your calls, emails, or texts. You have been ghosted by your soulmate, and you never saw it coming.

Why Do Soulmates Withdraw: When Your Soulmate Pulls Back
Why Do Soulmates Withdraw

You feel as if your world has come to an end. One day you were planning your future and now they’re gone. And you cannot for the life of you figure out why.

In many cases, your soulmates feelings got in the way.

They saw their future laying out before them, moving faster than makes sense to them. And feeling were replaced by fear. They wanted to be ready for this relationship, but the pace of it, and the emotion of it, got the better of them. In regular relationships the pace is slower. So we get ready for each new step in a relationship over time.

There really isn’t time to get used to each new step with soulmates because the relationship moves too quickly to catch up logically. This is a crisis point of the soulmate relationship we have discussed in Why Are  Soulmate Relationships So Difficult?

What they do going forward and how they do it, will determine if how and when they can get a handle on the connection between the two of you. While they are at this crisis point however, the only thing you can do is stay focused on yourself. You have zero control in the situation. This is their problem to resolve, not yours. Letting them be may be the hardest thing you have ever had to do in your life, but you have to do it. You have your own set of lessons and growth during this period of soulmate separation.


Soulmates withdraw because something happens in their life that’s a major distraction. It could be job drama, trauma and chaos, family issues or medical problems. Many of us like to share our issues with our friends, talking about different experiences and seeking their advice. Others like to shut down and shut up. Soulmates don’t react the same way all time, so keep that in mind. You may have a lot in common, but not handle crises the same way.

Your soulmate wants to be left alone and be incommunicado while they deal with their issues. Some people prefer to handle their issues by themselves first, before asking for help. So at times like this, offering to help, or saying you’re there for them, is not what they need. It may be what you need at times like this, but you need to allow them their own decisions on how to handle their personal problems. (As long as it is reasonable)


You are at the point of soulmate separation anxiety, and it would be productive for you to determine what life lesson is presenting itself to you. This is much better than self destructing. Remember this is something written in your soulmate contract before being born. It’s something you both decide to experience so the two of you could grow individually before you come back together to continue your soulmate relationship.

So instead of worrying about why they’re detaching from you, and if they will ever call again, take your own personal power back and focus on yourself, your kids, your friends or a personal project.

More than likely your separation is to help you learn to cope when your soulmate withdraws. You should have faith in your connection that a few days of withdrawal won’t end things permanently. Yes you may be lonely, but your soulmate needs to handle their business their way.

When a soulmate wants some space, give it to them. That doesn’t mean it’s over or a sign of terrible things to come. It can simply be just some alone time for your soulmate to get a grip on their life or deal with an issue that is personal to them. Soulmates do not have to everything together to be a great couple and have a long lasting relationship. Sometimes, even they have to go it alone, with their soulmate on stand by, ready to offer support if needed.

Originally posted on 2011-12-22 @ 11:04 pm

12 thoughts on “Why Do Soulmates Withdraw: When Your Soulmate Pulls Back”

  1. Yes Soul mates withdraw and in my case also it was the man that developed the relation and it was him who pulled away in fact as he termed it moved on .I understood the reason clearly and knew it had to happen but now am waiting for him to return coz there were REASONS y he pulled away but there r also REASONS,he should RETURN !

  2. Wow, this made me feel so much more equipped to deal with it when my soulmate pulls away, as they often do.

  3. The most storys i see are about men that whithdraw, but is the sotry thats told here also possible for women. Because my twin also whithdraw in a relationship.. And for the record, i am a man and my twin a woman.

  4. Hey I stumbled upon your site by mistake when i was searching Msn for this topic, I must point out your site is absolutely valuable I also enjoy the design, it is wonderful!


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