Common Soulmate Life Lessons: Patience, Unconditional Love and Detachment

Soulmate life lessons are a major component of soulmate relationships. If you’ve been reading our blog for a while now, you’re definitely aware of that.

Life lesson come as karmic lessons, spiritual lessons or personal growth. However you want to define it.

If you’re in, or have ever been in a soulmate relationship, you have to grow and evolve to a higher place. Soulmate relationships are karmic in nature. And like all karmic relationships, they allow us to work through the karma we agree to in a soulmate contract.


Many people operate under the false impression soulmate relationships are full of fun and laughter, great passionate sex, picnics in the park and long strolls on the beach.

And of course they do come with these things. But if you experience a soulmate relationship,  you can agree that at times it was no picnic. Was it as easy as you thought it would be? By their very nature soulmate relationships can be full of difficulties.

Please be aware that when one chooses to learn lessons the hard way, the relationship suffers immensely. We have soulmates because we agree to provide valuable life lessons for each other during our existence on the planet. You travel through time with these same soulmates life after life. You help each other learn, grow and evolve into who you become.

Soulmate relationships don’t have to be romantic relationships to provide the personal and spiritual growth. But romantic soulmate relationships provide the greatest opportunities to expand your soul’s work through these lessons.

It’s the depth of the connection that is the catalyst for learning, growing and change. Most people find themselves doing things they would never do for another person but their soulmate. This can go either way, positive or negative.

Common Soulmate Life Lessons Patience, Unconditional Love and Detachment
Common Soulmate Life Lessons


What are the biggest soulmate life lessons? There are usually three life lessons present in the soulmate karmic life lesson scenario. Those are patience, unconditional love and faith or trust in the Universe.

In other words, letting go of the control. You will learn, or should learn, that you can’t control this relationship or your soulmate. The only thing you can control is yourself. When you’re in a contract with your soulmate for a life lesson in patience, the usual scenario is one of you will leave that relationship for a period of time.

You’re probably thinking how can a soulmate leave if it’s a soulmate relationship? Well soulmates are not forever during every lifetime. But they are forever in that you have an eternity with them.

You will be together for a while of intense compatibility and spending time together. At some point, one of you will put on the brakes and either pause the relationship or seem to end it completely.


So how can you have the life lessons if you’re no longer together? That’s exactly when certain life lessons begin. The lessons to learn from a soulmate relationship aren’t always while you are closely connected with them.

It’s how you handle the separation or ending of the relationship. This is where the growth comes in. It also matters how high your standards are during the relationship. If you lower your standards, you obviously are not learning your lessons or furthering your path of spiritual growth. It may be necessary for you to be apart because neither of you is evolving spiritually.

Being in the relationship is the easier task. It’s the aftermath that takes courage, faith, fortitude and PATIENCE.

Now we’re not saying there are no soulmate life lessons when you’re together. So many times we see soulmate relationships, where everything is going great. And then out of the blue, one of the souls gets transferred overseas or an ex comes back into the picture with a lot of drama.

Maybe one of you becomes commitment-phobic due to past relationship baggage and truly fear trusting your heart and emotions. Then again, it could be one of you has an ill family member, loses a job, whatever the reason…it will be something that will test your faith, patience and courage.


Sometimes the two of you talk and decide to end the relationship or put it on hold. At other times one of the soulmates just disappears without saying anything at all. When you are ghosted by a soulmate it is a truly devastating experience.

Not knowing why they left, why they won’t speak to you or if they will ever come back is one of the toughest things to experience. This is also a test of faith. And a reminder that you only have control over yourself, not the other person. You will have to find the strength to push forward with your life until love returns.

Here’s an example…

Let’s say you’re in a deeply passionate relationship with your soulmate. But unfortunately, they’re already married. And so are you. It doesn’t matter to either of you because you both know you belong together. You have both been so unhappy in your past relationships. And you never expected to meet a soulmate.

Since you and your soulmate work together you’re able to spend daily time with one another. You both carry on in your states of bliss and don’t think of the consequences. Then, suddenly, your world comes crashing down because your soulmate gets fired. Your soulmate manages to find another job right away. The problem is that it’s on the other side of the country. And they must move far away.

You know without a doubt you belong together. Both of you decide even though it will be difficult, you will continue on with your relationship. The time has come, you both agree, to end your marriages so you can be together completely.

You tell your spouse first and move out. Now you wait for your soulmate to tell their spouse. But it doesn’t go as you had hoped. Your soulmate tells you they’re going to give it another shot with their spouse for the sake of the children. To make matters worse, in order to give it the chance they can, they must cut off communication with you.


Now what are you going to do? You really have no choice. You’re getting several life lessons here. One in patience. Another in faith. And yet another in detachment. You’re going to have these very important life lessons now.

Of course it’s going to be difficult. And it’s going to test you in every way possible. Your heart was ripped out and handed to you on a silver platter. Every single day will seem like and eternity until you hear from them again.

There’s nothing like waiting on something that’s very important to you. That will force you to be patient. And if you’re normally an impatient person, the lesson will seem doubly difficult. But obviously you need it in your life now, and this ties in with faith. If you truly believe you’re soulmates, you know the connection is still solid. It’s not a connection your soulmate can turn on and off like a light switch.

You will also have to detach from the situation. If you call them, text them, email them, or dwell on them, you will only make yourself more miserable. Detach and do something else. Go somewhere, learn a new skill, take a dance class, stay on your spiritual path and find your connection to God and the Universe. You have a choice in how you spend this time apart. Choose productive, faith based behaviors.

Detach to get through this period of time because you can’t control or manipulate what’s happening. You have to patiently wait to see the outcome, while living your life as best you can. Whether they come back or not, you still have to experience these life lessons of patience and detachment.

Remember, if you don’t learn the lessons, they repeat until you do. And who in their right mind would want to repeat such a painful lesson?


So where does the life lesson of unconditional love come in? In many cases, it’s loving a soulmate unconditionally. But it also means loving yourself.

Your soulmate may be causing you to lower your standards, expectations and behaviors in ways that are beneath you. You have to love yourself to a higher standard. And then in turn you can do the same for your soulmate.

A soulmate relationship is not for the two of you to be treating one another terribly. It’s not for you to simply stay in a dysfunctional relationship because you’re soulmates. It is for you both to rise to a higher, spiritual level. You may have to stand your ground and fight for the right kind of relationship, but the reward is worth it.


Originally posted on 2012-01-22 @ 3:33 pm

12 thoughts on “Common Soulmate Life Lessons: Patience, Unconditional Love and Detachment”

  1. I am in need of visiually seeing in words what my purpose is with my soulmate He and I met in eighth grade and fell in love after a few years of a beautiful friendship. After five beautiful carefree blissful years of teenage love we had our first child. then our second and after time of parenting and adulting in general at such early ages we began trying to find ourselves inbetween each other, I started college and a part time job he began hard labor and then BOOM he delevoped a dislike for our lives as young parents. He built up a wall and treated me poorly which lead me to seek out companionship from another man that then lead to me having an affair and him developing a drug addiction which then lead to us seperating and learning our life lessons without each other at this point?!?! Right? Well for going on our fifth year now of being apart we still struggle with the heart strings of the attachments we had with each other its not just me and its not just him…But all of our spouses since our breakup at some point notice and have pointed it out AND either broke it off because of it or continiously complainned about it. I try to be civil and stay as far away as I can knowing this but its as noticable as him just looking at me to some people (even strangers). I am in a relationship and so is he our choice of partners are both mutual friends we had as a couple. So they immediately have thier guards up because thats how strong and fulfilling our relationship looked to others. But here is my crossroads he came to me in a moment where I was single and his partner broke up with him so he came needing company we talked I tried to be his friend and only that, he of course was vulernable and wanted more but I didnt allow it to happen because that wasnt what he needed if he wants to have a good relationship with this girl now. Do I think she is the right girl for him NO but I am his ex so of course I would say that. She doesnt encourage him to be his best self or to be a good dad she actually because of our bond makes it that much more difficult for him to be. He went back to her. I too went back to my ex and then my soulmate was back a week later except this time my partner was there and he sat and conversed with us and we all got along good and he went on his way. I dont know how his relationship is going but what is my lesson I am supposed to be learning and what type of soulmate is he to me?

  2. One of my soulmates passed over and I’m in so much pain emotionally. Fortune I a blessed with understanding the process of our spiritual growth. I will miss the passionate relationship we had in this lifetime. I’m looking forward to our reunion.

  3. I have a question regarding soulmate relationships that ended. What I am wondering is why are there occasional reminders occurring? Does it mean there is still something unfinished to learn or do?

    And I don’t mean reminders like deja-vu that might be subjective but, for example, a person from his side I spoke to only a few times, just checking in out of the blue and then disappearing again. Is it a ‘test’ to see if I am truly detached and learned my lesson or a reminder that he’s still out there and that we might cross paths again?

    Also is it possible to get an answer to this through comparing natal charts, that is synastry and especially aspects to the NN?


Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.