It is very easy to idealize your soulmate. Strong feelings that undoubtedly are a part of a soulmate connection overcome all logic. Intense emotions will cover a lot of your soulmate’s sins and transgressions. It is so easy to see only their good points and behaviors while you completely ignore their bad side. When you continually see your soulmate through rose-colored glasses you are unable to address issues and concerns that are bothersome in your soulmate’s behavior. You have to stop idealizing your soul mate.
We realize you have a connection with your soulmate that’s beyond anything you have ever felt with anyone else. You never thought it could or would happen to you, but it did. You find yourself willing to do things, and put up behaviors, you normally would never tolerate from anyone else in your life. You know how great the relationship can be so you hang in there with them. They may refuse to show you how they feel, yet you remain centered on the ‘deep down feelings’ only soulmates have for each other. You remember how loving they can be and yearn for the day you can have an ideal relationship.
You need to knock it off. It’s time for the rose-colored glasses to come off and see things from a more realistic perspective. You are dealing with a human being, with issues and imperfections that are as much a part of your soulmate as all the mushy, gooey stuff. It is great to see the best in your soulmate. There is nothing wrong with having a positive outlook. It only becomes a problem when it keeps you from addressing the problems within your soulmate relationship.
It’s quite magical to think you could have a supportive, harmonious relationship filled with love. That is just great; it’s good to know and important to the success of the relationship. It’s equally important to understand and acknowledge why you don’t have a supportive, harmonious relationship with your soulmate. The first step is to stop idealizing your soul mate.
Steps to Stop Idealizing Your Soulmate
- The first way to stop idealizing your soulmate is to stop making excuses for them. Sure, they may have stress at work or wherever else in their lives, but it can’t keep excusing how it affects your relationship. Stop excusing all their excuses, especially if your soulmate’s excuses are lame. You want things to change. You want your soulmate to stop behaving like an idiot. You don’t want excuses, you want action.
- The second way to stop idealizing your soulmate is to focus on your recent history, not your past history. Your soulmate was probably awesome when you first got together and everything was sunshine and roses. This isn’t the life you are currently living. What relationship came out of that time? Your current relationship needs your attention not the one you had in the beginning. Deal with who your soulmate is now, not who they were when you first got together. See them for who they are now, not just who they were then. Your soulmate is a sum of both of those parts. You may not like one side of them, but you can’t get rid of them or deal with them until you accept the other side exists.
- If you and your soulmate have separated or ended your relationship, don’t idealize them. It is crucial to remember the reasons for your separation or why your soulmate relationship ended. Don’t forget what the issues were that drove you apart. Don’t focus on how much you miss them, instead focus on what you don’t miss. Don’t get yourself to the point that you idealize them so much you will welcome them back with open arms. If you idealize your soulmate and don’t learn from your experience with them, the experience will repeat itself again with him or another soulmate relationship down the line. The same problems will return and it’s very likely you will be separated or break up again.
A soulmate is the one many consider to be the ideal match or the ideal mate. But don’t idealize your soulmate so much that you can’t tackle the issues and challenges that come with soulmate relationships.
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