What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined for life? … to strengthen each other…to be at one with each other in silent unspeakable memories. ~George Eliot

Spiritual Growth

Losing Your Soulmate is One of the Worst Experiences in Life

Losing your soulmate can be one of the worst, if not the worst, experiences in your life. That unique special connection you share with another human being is one of the greatest feelings in the world, when you find them. On the flip side, losing your soulmate can be one of the worst feelings in the world because you think you will never feel love like that again.


How can you replace or replicate a one of a kind connection? As we wrote in our article Soulmates Don’t Grow on Trees, you obviously can’t just buy another one on E-bay or at the mall. What took you so long to finally find, only to wind up losing, is a devastating blow. But before you sink deeper into depression or have a panic attack, losing a soulmate is not the end of the world in many cases.

Losing Your Soulmate

               Losing Your Soulmate


In some cases, if you are losing your soulmate, there is a good reason for it. Your soulmate may be causing drama and sabotaging your relationship. Losing your soulmate for a while might actually benefit your relationship in the long run.Time apart, when they have had some time to think, and really know what it is like to lose YOU, could be all it takes for them to get the wake up call they need.


Wouldn’t you rather lose your soulmate for a while only to have your relationship be strong and better because of that time apart? Or, would you rather not lose your soulmate now, allowing them cause even more damage that could ruin the relationship for good anyway?


If you have done something truly terrible, that any reasonable person would consider ending a relationship with you over, then hopefully you have learned your lesson. If you are responsible for losing your soulmate, it could take a long while before you have a chance to get them back. Instead of making a nuisance of yourself and making them feel disrespected, back off. We know you want them back, but you may not deserve them back right now.


There are consequences to our actions, and your losing your soulmate, often temporarily, can be one of them. Your soulmate needs to get over their anger. Chasing them like a lunatic usually backfires. They just lash out all that anger on YOU. Give your soulmate some time to heal, and use that time to make sure you learned your lesson, and that the lesson sticks with you. You need to get it right, because if they do give you another chance, that could be your very last one.


If you did something minor, or not on purpose, and your soulmate is using that as an excuse to end your relationship, stand strong. Don’t let them punish you that way. Don’t let your fear of losing your soulmate make you grovel, beg, and apologize profusely when you shouldn’t have to. Letting your fear of losing your soulmate can often make your soulmate UNAFRAID of losing YOU. You don’t want that to happen, because if that fear goes, the chemistry dims, and their respect for you goes out the window.


If you are experiencing losing a soulmate because they have passed on, you are going to need time to heal. You may meet another soulmate at some point in your life, but for right now you have to focus on just yourself. The pain and loss of losing your soulmate is especially hard, so get support and help from others if/when you need it. Take time to grieve, be good to yourself and focus on some positive self-care.


Could Some Soulmate Connections be BAD for You?

Could Some Soulmate Connections be BAD for You?

Some soulmate connections could be ‘bad’ for you if you are unable to discern the ones you need to avoid. There is a common misconception that all soulmate connections are good and that you will live happily ever after. Of course it would be great if this were true, but unfortunately this is not the case. On the other hand, soulmate connections are to teach us things about ourselves and present opportunities for spiritual and personal growth.   Here are some examples of when when soulmate connections could quite possibly be bad for you, or just plain bad.

could some soulmate connections be bad for you

Could Some Soulmate Connections be Bad for You?

  1. If you find yourself in a relationship with someone who is overbearing, rude, abusive, disrespectful and unwilling to change, this could possibly be a bad soulmate connection. But how can you know for sure? If things were great in the beginning (they always are by the way) but after the first two months his behavior changed for the worst, it might be time to assess this relationship. How does this relationship make you feel? Do you feel you have given away your power to this relationship but feel you need to hang in there because things were so great in the beginning? Is your soulmate willing to discuss this and make the changes needed to improve your relationship? If not, you could be experiencing one of the bad soulmate connections.
  2. You may feel you have a soulmate connection to someone but this does not always mean they feel the same. When you feel a soulmate connection to someone who does not reciprocate, you are trying to turn the relationship into something more than what it really is. You may both feel a very strong, intense connection to each other, especially sexually, but this does not always indicate it is a true soulmate relationship. If you are not both in agreement that this is a true soulmate connection, you might end up really hurt from having unrealistic expectations from this relationship. If he views your relationship as nothing more than a booty call, you could very well be stuck in a bad soulmate connection situation. You may feel the connection and have deep feelings for him, but in reality, you expectations for this person and this relationship could be very much off course.
  3. Another example of soulmate connections that could be bad for you is when your soulmate is married to someone else. Your married soulmate may tell you he will end his marriage when in reality he no intention of divorce. Even though the connection is so intense between the two of you (again, especially sexually) he may be too ingrained in his life with his wife. It is not that he does not love you nor see you as a soulmate partner, he could just not be willing to create upheaval in his life at the moment. Unless you are comfortable being someone’s mistress or willing to be considered ‘second’ in their life, this particular soulmate connection could be bad for you. Please see our blog When Your Soulmate is Married to Someone Else.
  4. Soulmate connections that take over you entire life could potentially be bad for you. Whenever you meet a soulmate it is normal to want to spend as much time with them as you can. This is totally understandable. But if you spend so much time with your soulmate, thinking about your soulmate, planning dates with your soulmate and fantasizing about your future with your soulmate, but allowing everything else in your life to fall by the wayside, this is probably not good for you. Likewise, if you soulmate partner insists that you spend all your free time with him, his family and his friends and you have not seen your family and friends in months, or years, this is quite possibly another example of soulmate connections gone bad.

We are not saying that these soulmate connections could ruin your life but we would like you to consider how your soulmate relationship is affecting you and the rest of your life. If you are feeling harmonious in you day to day life, all is well, but if you are questioning or wondering if something is wrong, you may want to consider assessing your life and relationship.

It is also important to consider that perhaps bad soulmate connections are not soulmate relationships at all. They could be karmic relationships that you have allowed yourself to believe is a soulmate relationship. Karmic relationships, as well as soulmate relationships, are in your life to cause you to evaluate an aspect of your life or your relationship, that needs addressing and probably modifying.   Karmic relationships have a tendency to highlight the areas of our lives that need work allowing us to have personal and often spiritual transformation. After all, that is why we are all here.

When Your Soulmate is Married to Someone Else

When Your Soulmate is Married to Someone Else

When you soulmate is married to someone else, you may very often feel as if your world is often falling apart. Even though you met with great intensity and you both recognize the connection you share is unlike any other, you wonder if you will ever truly be able to be together as a couple. You were not looking to fall in love with a married man, but you did.   The connection between you is intense and you feel tied to them in some way, shape or form. You may wonder what his marriage is really like. You may wonder if he is at a point where he is looking to get out of his marriage or if he is just looking for an affair. He and his wife may have children together, a business together, or have financial ties together that would be hard to unravel. You may think the universe must have a wicked of sense of humor because you have waited so long to meet this great guy but he is married. This is one of the most difficult dilemmas for soulmate relationships, you meet your soulmate, but your soulmate is married…to someone else.

When Your Soulmate is Married to Someone Else

When Your Soulmate is Married to Someone Else


So, what should you do about this connection you feel with this married man you believe is your soulmate?

When your soulmate is married to someone else, your options are somewhat limited. You can either 1) have an affair or 2) keep it on the back burner until he gets divorced. Each of these options run their individual risks. If you enter into an affair when your soulmate is married, you may become even more emotionally invested with this relationship. It could take months, years, or decades until your soulmate leaves his wife and gets divorced. On the other hand, he may never get divorced and all you will be is the other woman for the rest of your life. But if this is a soulmate relationship, perhaps it is the only form of relationship defined by your soulmate contract for this lifetime.

You may believe he will leave his wife someday, but will he ever get divorced? He may tell you he will, but he may be lying. He may tell you they have an open marriage and it is perfectly acceptable for the two of you to be together because you are soulmates, and since it is an open marriage his wife will not care. Before you enter into an affair, hoping to get more down the line, you need to know how he feels about the situation, if he really recognizes the two of you are soulmates and what course of action he is going to take. It has to go both ways or you should not even think of starting an affair. Before you get in over your head and fall deeply in love with him, you need to think about what the future really holds for the two of you. You need to think about what could happen if everything works out but  also consider what could go wrong. Because this is where you will be truly challenged in this relationship.

Your next option would be to wait it out. Give it some time and see if his marriage thrives or ends without you involved with your soulmate in any way. Sometimes being involved with your soulmate keeps him in his marriage, because he has it all. Even though you want to see him and spend time with him, it actually enables him to stay with his wife. She takes care of the home and kids and you take care of his other needs, he has the best of both worlds. You don’t want to enable him to stay married, do you? You can run the risk of him staying married longer than he should, or staying married forever. The fact that you are soulmates may not have been your choice, but what you choose to do about your married soulmate, is up to you. There is a right and wrong path for every situation, and if you are in an affair or contemplating getting into one, you need to make sure you choose the right path.

So why would God, the Universe, or the Divine, really bring a married soulmate into your life? Believe it or not there are many reasons for this and since soulmates are about life lessons and personal growth, it more than likely has something to do with an aspect of both of your lives that need to be assessed and resolved. You may think you are ready for a truly committed relationship with someone, but when your soulmate is married, it makes it very difficult to have that committed relationship.

Perhaps you are at a place in your life where you are not truly available for a relationship so you have attracted someone else who is not available. On the other hand maybe you are having a lesson on your own self worth, by refusing to allow yourself to be second fiddle to the guys wife. Perhaps this is a lesson in setting boundaries by refusing to be a booty call for your married soulmate because you just value yourself too much.

For the soulmate who is married, perhaps it is to serve as the catalyst for change to expose to him the reality of his own life. If he is miserable in his marriage, he needs to look closely at that and decide if he can continue to live a lie. If not, then he can either end it to be with you, or decide to really give his marriage everything he has to see if it can get any better. What ever the cause, the crossing of your paths is not coincidence. There is a deeper meaning here for having this married soulmate in your life.

When Will He Change? When YOU Do!

When will he change? How long will it take for him to change? How long will it take for him to commit? When will he share his feelings with me? When will we be in a relationship? How long will it be until he asks me out? When will he tell me he loves me?  All of these questions are not just about him. They are also about YOU.

Why are you so focused on speeding things up? Do you really want to go from first date to committed relationship in two weeks? What is the rush? There may be reasons you are unaware of that are slowing things down. God, or the universe’s timing is perfect, humans are not. When we try and force things, or change the speed that a relationship is developing, we can often do damage and create a negative result. This would make you very unhappy!

When will he change

When Will He Change?

There are obviously lessons for him to learn, but you can bet there are also some lessons for you! So instead of turning your focus to him, and asking us “when will he change?” shift your attention to yourself and see what need to be transformed in your own life.

For instance, let’s say you want him to treat you with more respect. What can you do to encourage him to change his behavior. Well, while waiting for him to get a clue on the right way to treat you, which may take a while if he is kind of slow, start demanding respect in a way that is comfortable for you.

The problems in relationships go both ways. You have a part that you played in it. Without fixing what you broke, the entire puzzle will NOT BE COMPLETED. Both of you must be in sync, and both of you need to do something. You may think you have done everything you can, when in reality, you are just like him: doing the same things you always do.

In an effort to get things rolling, you may do things or say things that cause the relationship expansion to slow down or bring it to an abrupt halt. You need to find out what the right course of action is, and what to avoid doing under any and every circumstance. We understand you get frustrated and are tired of waiting. So why not be proactive and productive instead of reactive and unproductive?

You can’t make the changes you need to make, and neither can he, unless you commit fully to changing. Going through the motions is like going on a diet. When you lose the weight, you go off the diet. Same thing with change. You have to make a permanent change, just like you want him to.

The first part of your change is to let go of your old thoughts, habits, tricks, behaviors, and the past. Today is a new day. See things through his eyes and not your own. Bring a new outlook and perspective, and a new plan of action. When you start seeing the changes in you that bring about positive changes in him, it will reinforce and validate what you are doing, which will give you fuel to keep going.

Change takes time, but all it takes to get things started is a step in the right direction.

Dark Night of the Soul and Soulmate Relationships

Dark Night of the Soul and Soulmate Relationships

A dark night of the soul is often considered to be a crises point in one’s relationship with God, the Goddess or the Universe. The ultimate outcome for a dark night of the soul, is union with the Divine. To reach that union, however, one must travel through the darkness and have a dark night of the soul experience. When we journey through a dark night experience, we may often feel abandoned by God, or separated from the Divine. We may feel our prayers go unanswered, that God does not hear us and that others in our lives may disregard us. It is a time of adversity and suffering. The dark night of the soul represents darkness we must endure to reach the union with the Divine. A dark night of the soul hits us when we are at rock bottom and have nowhere else to look, but up. It is the pulling ourselves up by the bootstraps and getting on with our lives that creates the journey back to the Divine. And this is where we will see the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.

In a real dark night of the soul it is always three o’clock in the morning — F. Scott Fitzgerald

Dark Night of the Soul

Dark Night of the Soul

Many people in soulmate relationships often feel they are going through a dark night of the soul. A separation from a soulmate, or ending of a soulmate relationship, can very much feel like a dark night of the soul experience. You may feel as if you world has come to and end and that you will not be able endure the heartache and heartbreak you most certainly feel when you have lost a soulmate. When your soulmate leaves you, ends the relationship or tells you he needs a break from the relationship, you feel as if you have had the rug ripped out from beneath you. You might even feel as if you have had your heart ripped out. Some of these endings though are temporary, but sadly some of them will be permanent.

A dark night of the soul in a soulmate relationship can have several layers. You could be experiencing the dark night while dealing with a soulmate separation or ending of a soulmate relationship. During this time you will feel and mourn the loss of your soulmate. Instead of getting on with your life you might find yourself in a deep depression, feeling melancholy and obsessing over and over again about your soulmate returning to you. You might forgo paying bills, taking care of the yard and failing to do the things you normally would in taking good care of yourself.  More than likely you will cry out to God, the Universe, the Angels and all your friends to try to understand and comprehend why this is happening to you. And this is ok, because it will draw you closer to the divine spark. The loss of the relationship is the thing that brings you closer to God.

Soulmate relationships, as we have discussed time and again, are about personal and spiritual growth. Unfortunately most folks don’t encounter personal growth when everything is groovy. It takes hitting rock bottom, finding yourself in the gutter or feeling as if you have lost everything to make people cry out to the Universe for help. You cry, you pray, you cry again and pray some more. This is the experience that allows us to have the union with the Divine, that allows you to give it all to the Universe, because you just can’t take anymore. It is what will ultimately allow you to find peace.

There are times when the soulmate returns to create a fresh start and new beginning, but you still traveled through that dark night. It might have been a time of loneliness and isolation, a time of deep despair, but during that time, you grew in some way. There had to be growth on some level during this dark night of the soul. It is perhaps the very thing you needed to work on and address before the two of you could reunite and grow together as a couple. Your soulmate had to learn something as well, and probably had his own dark night experience. The point is, you both evolved through this separation and can now embrace your relationship from a higher perspective. You met the Divine on your journey and now the relationship will be stronger, better and more mature.

Excerpt from The Dark Night of the Soul – Loreena McKennitt

Oh night thou was my guide
oh night more loving than the rising sun
Oh night that joined the lover
to the beloved one
transforming each of them into the other

Within my pounding heart
which kept itself entirely for him
He fell into his sleep
beneath the cedars all my love I gave
And by the fortress walls
the wind would brush his hair against his brow
And with its smoothest hand
caressed my every sense it would allow

I lost myself to him
and laid my face upon my lovers breast
And care and grief grew dim
as in the mornings mist became the light
There they dimmed amongst the lilies fair

Are you going through a dark night of the soul experience with your soulmate or twin flame relationship? Has the relationship ended and you are having a difficult time dealing with the emotional trauma of that ending and fear you will not see the light again?  Are you currently separated from your soulmate or twinflame partner and wonder if you will be reunited? Do you question if you will be able to find true love again? Lady Sarah and Sophia Elise are expert soulmate twinflame psychic advisors and love and relationship life coaches. If you are dealing with a difficult relationship issue or breakup, they will help you see the light at the end of the tunnel again and empower you to get your life on track.


soulmate psychic sophia elise

Sophia Elise

Soulmate ~ Twinflame Certified Psychic

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lady sarah soulmate psychic

Lady Sarah

Soulmate ~ Twinflame Certified Psychic

2012 Member Banner




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